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Christmas Happy or Not!

This Saturday has been great. This whole month has been pretty good. I have all my holiday shopping complete, the wrapping is also almost complete and I have decided to declutter my home and office to bring in the new year with space for the new.

I turned on some Christmas music while I was working away on my decluttering project. Playing all the regular Christmas songs we hear on the radio every year. I listened and worked and worked and listened and was called downstairs for dinner. Wonderful, I have worked up an appetite. We continue to listen to Christmas music Softley in the background so that we may have a conversation during dinner. All is well.

After dinner, my husband decides to wash the dishes and asks me to fold the laundry before I return to my decluttering project. By this time I have listened to my Christmas playlist one and a half times. Then I notice I haven ‘t heard my favorite songs and my favorite album. Jingle Bells by Barbara Streisand and Once Upon A Christmas Album by Dolly Parton & Kenny Rogers. So I add both to my playlist. And off I went, ready to sing out loud just like old times.

I sang Jingle Bells by Barbara Streisand with enjoyment and then I hit shuffle for the Dolly Parton & Kenny Rogers album. I’m ready to sing and belt out the songs just like I used to when I was a child. Oh, how I loved to sing. Singing was my happy place. When I went to open my mouth to sing the first song, no words came out. Instead, it was tears running down my cheeks.

With the press of a button, the tunes started playing and the tears started falling. I knew exactly why I was crying. I was suddenly back in my childhood Christmas morning. The tears were from missing how things used to be and also upset at how things used to be. Christmas is not pleasant for everyone.

I allowed myself to continue to cry and release while listening and reminiscing my childhood. And I started thinking about Scrooge. The Classic Christmas story. I can see why Scrooge was so miserable. His own heart was aching. As was mine today. “Kelly writes that Scrooge may have been influenced by Dickens's conflicting feelings for his father, whom he both loved and demonized.”

Robert Douglas-Fairhurst, a professor of English literature, considers that in the opening part of the book covering young Scrooge's lonely and unhappy childhood, and his aspiration for money to avoid poverty "is something of a self-parody of Dickens's fears about himself"; the post-transformation parts of the book are how Dickens optimistically sees himself.

Christmas can be joyful for some, while it triggers sadness and loneliness in others. I feel I experience it both ways. I have done much work to transform my life and heal from the hurts of my past. However, my past is my past. Most days, I choose to leave it there. At the same token, I can be triggered by the music, the smells in the kitchen or just the many parties during the holidays just like many of you. I choose to make new memories.

And before I face the world, attend parties or spend time with my own family during the holidays, I check in with myself, allow myself to feel my feelings, cry it out if I have to or write in my journal, scream in a pillow or use my pink bat to pound on a pillow to work out my feelings. Then after the above, I write in my journal to express whatever I am feeling to let it go.

So, while I appreciate that Christmas is not always a joyful time of year for many, if you are struggling, know that you are not alone. There are resources available to help you through. I encourage you to lean on a friend or someone you can trust and express how you feel. We are, after all, humans with feelings. And even though sometimes it sucks, really great things can come from the sucky parts of life.

Love to all you RockStars!


I’m Coach Jackie Thomas.

I also happen to be a Nurse in the Healthcare field. I’ve been a PSW as well.

I’m a wife and mom who loves her family. But, sometimes, after a “bad day” or dealing with some intense trauma, I was triggered and brought it home to my kids and spouse. It wasn’t working.

At the height of my burnout, I went looking for solutions. Anything to make me feel better again. To love my career again. To reignite my passion again.

I found evolved NLP. The combination of science meets spiritual resonated with me. The work is founded in practices of forgiveness and healing on a cellular level for lasting true change.

To rebound, rebuild, and repair from days of trauma, disease, and stress.

To reclaim our passion to serve.

To love our career and our lives - at the same time.

These tools gave me my life back.

They can do the same for you.

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